A day or so after we were married, my husband and I took a bubble bath. He, graciously, crunched his back up against the end of the tub with the faucet and I was leaning against the smooth end - our legs meeting in the middle.
I vividly remember stroking his calf/shin and thinking "This is my husband's leg. My. Husband's. Leg. This is my husband's leg". Slowly the words rolled over the folds of my brain, making new tracks in my sensory area, as I eventually learned to own those words: my husband.
And, then, in December/January of this year, I clearly remember looking at him standing in our closet getting dressed and thinking, "This may be my ex-husband's leg" - much angst involved. [Insert broken heart here]
I remember those first 24-48 hours of marriage with such a clarity. We repeatedly introduced ourselves to each other while shaking hands: "Hi, I'm your wife/husband" and giggling from the utter lunacy of the sound of it. We had steak for dinner and slow-danced in the kitchen to Marc Cohn's True Companion:
Baby, I've been searching like everybody else
Can't say nothing different about myself.
Sometimes I'm an angel, And sometimes I'm cruel.
But when it comes to love I'm just another fool.
Yes, I'll climb a mountain
I'm gonna swim the sea
There ain't no act of God, girl
Could keep you safe from me.
My arms are reaching out
Out across this canyon,
I'm asking you to be my true companion.
True companion
True companion
So don't you dare and try to walk away
I've got my heart set on our wedding day.
I've got this vision of a girl in white,
Made my decision that it's you allright.
And when I take your hand,
I'll watch my heart set sail.
I'll take my trembling fingers
And I'll lift up your veil.
Then I'll take you home,
And with wild abandon
Make love to you just like a true companion.
You are my true companion
I got a true companion
True companion
When the years have done irreparable harm,
I can see us walking slowly arm in arm
Just like the couple on the corner do,
'Cause girl I will always be in love with you.
And when I look in your eyes,
I'll still see that spark
Until the shadows fall
Until the room grows dark.
Then when I leave this Earth,
I'll be with the angels standin'
I'll be out there waiting for my true companion.
Just for my true companion
True companion
True companion
Original comment posted August 11, 2006 at 8:26AM. Found in archive & working to republish all comments eventually:
"I'm sorry. I don't know you or what you've been through, apart from the small bit I've just read on your blog. But I hope it gets better for you. Clover" http://www.blogger.com/profile/08793681725475475156
Original comment posted August 11, 2006 at 8:26AM. Found in archive & working to republish all comments eventually:
"I'm sorry. I don't know you or what you've been through, apart from the small bit I've just read on your blog. But I hope it gets better for you.
Clover"
http://www.blogger.com/profile/08793681725475475156