The highest reward for a person's toil is not what they get for it, but what they become by it. - John Ruskin
Okay friends, I at least have the damn header photo back in place!
[A bajillion thanks to isnaini.com for STILL having this 'primitive' blogger template & images available to use. Blogger has updated their formats/layouts and whatnot at warp speed since my little blog came on the scene in 2006. But I don't care. This template is perfect for me, and I love this header photo so much! It was me to a T back in the day, alone in a corner clinging to music & words]
I have also spend almost 2 hours getting some more blog posts back up from 2009-2011. I am almost caught up with the old posts (woot!) and can thereafter GO FORTH and catch y'all up on all the Bidniss!
the following was in an enormous post I have saved in Blogger Drafts, with so many quotes and insights and lyrics from people all over the internet. That I have been compiling since this blog began. Read this one today, and while a bit on the cheese side it spoke to me. And whenever one does, I am compelled to post it regardless of the Fromage Factor:
I do not know how long I'll live
But while I live, Lord, let me give
Some comfort to someone in need
By smile or nod, kind word or deed
And let me do what ever I can
To ease things for my fellow man
I want naught but to do my part
To "lift" a tired or weary heart
To change folks' frowns to smiles again
Then I will not have lived in vain
And I'll not care how long I'll live
If I can give... and give... and give
-Author Unknown
I had a website with a boatload of content & in the Summer of Cancer & Custody I forgot to pay the bill and they deleted the entire content - which included ALL THE PHOTOS linked to this blog - including the header. Fuck. Just realized all this. Apologies. And some grieving because, damn. I took most of those photos, or searched hard to find them. fuckfuckfuck.
so we are kodachome (my tag for photo posts) -less for the foreseeable future. ARRRRGH. dammitall.
May 2011 - I deleted this blog - stupidly - when people in my real life somehow discovered it, and caused a bunch of uproar and panic.
Some months later 2011 - realized, hey, fuck you people! Shame on me. Went to the archived file of the blog I pulled over from Blogger before I deleted the contents; the entries are a SOUP of bunched up entries with dates & comments all jumbled up. Seriously. I was further kicking my own ass for deleting the blog. I started it six years ago. That's a load of posts. What was I thinking?
A wee bit at a time 2011 - I copy/paste/reformat each entry back into the blog, about 4-5 entries at a time. I am up to 2009 and then life gets in the way....
2012 is one of the worst years I have ever had, including cancer and The ExHusband moving my kids 3 states away. Yes I fought it. Lawyers are evil bastards and the "justice" system promotes anything but. Don't get me started. More on that at some point.
The only good thing about 2012 is the man I am about to marry - yes omigod I am getting remarried - on New Year's Eve on the white sand of the gulf coast. More on that at some point too. I was DONE with men, DONE I SAY! I was on dating sites for free meals or whatever, and only killing time. Something (or someone) to do. Then, Next! And he brought all that Crazy to a screeching halt the night I met him - although I did turn him down the first time he asked me out. Because why? Because my instinct is to obviously pick the Wrong effing men. Lucky for me he emailed me again, and convinced me to just go have a glass of wine. I have to find a good Stepford nickname for him & tell that story to y'all too. Because I'll be damned if I thought there was anyone out there who would 'get' me, and be completely batshit in love with me, and be the best thing that ever happened to me. I thought that stuff didn't exist. So, if anything, let me throw a little hope out there in the darkness.
So. A reader emailed me and asked if I was still blogging. And I thought: damn, get in those archives and give it a go when you can. Catch up, and keep talking.
And therefore I will. As much as I can with my insane work schedule and losing my mind with this wedding thing. (I never had one before, or a honeymoon, so by damn we are having a small -yet high quality- shindig!)
